Bedrest - 23 weeks

I went back to see Dr. Bradford again today. I was just sure she would release me from bedrest. I was wrong. She said that I was severely dehydrated and I had an elevated ketone level in my urine. She did another urinalysis and noticed that I had a bladder infection. She is sending another sample to the lab to confirm her diagnosis. Meanwhile, she has me on an antibiotic. She did another pelvic exam and took a culture for a fetal fibronectin test. This test will help to rule out preterm labor. The pelvic exam, alone, is unable to rule it out. At the same time, my cervix is closed and looks "fantastic."

She asked me if I had ever had anxiety. I told her that I had experienced some during college several years ago, but not necessarily lately. She asked about my stress level. I thought, "where do I begin?" I told her about our lawsuit and the problems with our house. She was concerned that Kevin and I both were experiencing a lot of stresses so she suggested marital counseling. Mostly to strengthen our marriage before the babies are born. She said once they're born, it will increase our stress level times ten. Of course, I called the insurance company to find out if they covered marital counseling. With our luck, they don't. Awesome. Not totally sure how this is going to work out now. I will admit that I am extremely worried about giving these babies a good home and a good life. I want to be the best mom ever and I'm scared that I won't live up to mine, Kevin's, or their expectations. I want them to have a great place to live, along with all the necessities, and even extras. Hopefully, we'll be able to give them those extra things.

For now, we decided on buying cribs for both babies. I couldn't help but think that a playard wouldn't be strong enough or soft enough for them to sleep on. We purchased a few sets of clothes and a record book for the baby boy. We're still waiting to see what we'll get from showers before we buy anything else. If we get gift cards, we can go buy the cribs. Is it possible to be excited and scared at the same time?