I've noticed that since we moved up here, I have been sick more than I've ever been. I think a lot of it has to do with stress. When Sunday arrives, I literally get sick to my stomach because I have to go back to work in less than 24 hours. I have never had that happen before. As you might have guessed, it's a Monday and I'm at home...sick. Some days I wonder if I'll even make it until summer.
The kids are doing okay, but I can tell they are stressed out (because mommy and daddy are.) B came up to me last night with blood all over his face and hands. After a brief moment of freaking out, I realized that he cut his hand. K1 said that there was glass over by where he was playing. K1 had broken a measuring cup while cooking this weekend and glass splattered everywhere. Anyway, band-aids are too big for him, so we wrapped his finger in gauze. He figured out a way to take it off. It took us a few tries, but we finally found a wrap that worked.
Lately, the kids have not been sleeping as well as they had been before. They're waking up in the middle of the night...once if we're lucky, but mostly two or three times. Last night, B slept with us because he wouldn't let me put him in his bed. Around 1:30, K2 woke up so I grabbed her and laid her on the couch with me. That's where we slept until about 6:00.
Now, I'm not an expert on babies, but I think they get stressed out as much if not more than their parents. K2 cries when K1 and I argue (or yell at each other.) It breaks my heart to see her get so upset. I wonder what this might be doing to her brain development. As a parent, we always get unwanted advice from people who think they know best. "You should do ____________." or "Children need _____________." I am fine with taking advice from people, but I am not fine with people giving me advice when they don't know our situation and they don't have twins. Life with twins is different than if you have two children of different ages. We have TWO children very close on the same learning curve and they are exploring and learning things at the same time. There is no clear-cut way of doing things. Each child and each family is different so you have to do what works best for you. At the same time, things are a little easier to control when you're a stay-at-home mom. For example, we're wondering how potty training is going to work with two kids of the same age and two different baby sitters. My mother-in-law said that K1 was potty trained by 18 months. Ha! Not everyone is a genius who can make an A in Honors Engineering Physics or Calculus during college without opening the textbook. K1 wants to start potty training now, but I think we need to wait until I'm home with them so that we are consistent.
Speaking of consistency, that is a big deal as a parent. Discipline should be consistent. It's hard when there are two children of the same age and they are constantly testing the limits. Somedays, I feel like I am so overworked and exhausted that I don't care. I spend all day disciplining other people's kids that I come home and I don't want to do it anymore. This is part of the reason that we felt that I should stay at home. I need to invest my energy on our children. I know that education is a ministry, but so is being a mom. I feel that as a parent, my first ministry is to my family, my children especially. If my family is falling apart, how can I minister to others? Some people are great at balancing these. I am not. I would prefer to find one thing and focus on and be good at that instead of spreading myself too thin. The family is the first school and the parents are the first teachers. Some parents pass their kids off to teachers and expect us to perform miracles when they are not even teaching them. At 17 months old, children's minds are sponges! They can learn so much and I need to be the one teaching it to them. We can, by no means, afford me to stay at home. By the same token, we can't afford me not to stay at home. When they are older, I would like to return to education, but for right now, I am needed here at home.
The kids had their first play out in the snow last weekend, but I'll have to upload photos later. I'm not feeling well, so I need to rest. We have parent-teacher meetings tomorrow and I don't even have grades in the computer. By the way, I still don't have an official grading program. I had to find a free one online.
No comments:
Post a Comment