Calming of the Storm

As the day gets closer when I get to see and hold my two little ones, I busy myself to take my mind off of being without the kids. I know that everything that we do, we do it for all of us. We want the kids to have the opportunity to explore nature and snow. There are parks galore up here and knowing that B and K will be able to go hike on a Sabbath afternoon without blistering heat makes me smile. The vision of them making snow angels on the lawn makes me giggle. I can't wait. They will have the opportunity to go to the private school where I teach and be right across the hall from me. I look forward to being able to be in the same building with them for 11 years. (The junior academy goes from K-10th grade.) I am excited that they will be learning in a Christian environment.

I got my Wisconsin plates (for my car) yesterday. I am still waiting on a few documents to get my license. Once I get that, I will be an official Wisconsiner (or Wisconsinite...the term "Texan" was so much easier.)

I am thankful for technology and the ability to travel long distances in order to see family. It does make things a little easier. As difficult as all of this has been, I have never seen anything fall in to place quite like this. I know that He has a plan and I know that we are doing His work. When He calls, we must answer.

Happy Sabbath

New School

School started on Monday and I really enjoy having 14 kids all day. It is nice to get to know the same kiddos. I still have moments where I wish I could stay at home with B and K, though. I often wonder if I will regret the decision to work. I haven't seen my babies in a little over a week and I miss them more than anything. I skyped with them the other day and K tried to reach for the computer screen to hug me. I felt awful. Since then, I have been wondering if we made the right decision to move. It breaks my heart to think that the kids will not be with their grandparents on a regular basis.

I am busier and more tired than I ever expected. Some days, I want to just crawl into a corner and read to get my mind off of everything going on around me. I have lesson plans for seven different subjects to prepare for on a weekly basis, plus I have paperwork to fill out (for employment) with the conference, I still need to finish my room and order books for the English II class, get prepared for the kids' baby dedication coming up, and help Kevin get everything he needs to move up here. My "to do" list gets longer everyday. Oh, I also have to get a driver's license and new plates for my car.

Anyway, on the baby front...K's 3rd tooth (on the top) popped through today and she stood for a while today when my grandmother went to visit them at my mom's house. Bryce isn't walking like Frankenstein anymore. He's walking like a toddler now. Oh, I miss them so much that I can barely stand it. One more week before I see them. I can do it.

One Year Ago and Teaching

One year ago today, God blessed us with two bundles of joy! It is hard to believe it has gone by this fast. The first four months were a blur because we were so exhausted.

Originally, I had their birthday party planned out. It was going to be perfect with cute decorations and little party favors. With the whole moving thing, I didn't have time so the party wasn't quite what I expected it to be. We didn't end up with the gorgeous decorations or party favors and I am fine with that. I have never been a decorating guru / Martha Stewart-type woman anyway. The kids got to open presents and spend time with the family before we move and that is all that I really wanted. 

So, we made it to Milwaukee last night and K1 flew back to Texas this afternoon. I really wanted to see the kids and spend time with them on their birthday, but things didn't work out that way. Before we left, we bought a webcam for our computer at home and I was able to Skype with K1 and the kids. This next week and a half will be the toughest for me yet. Not only am I alone in a new city, but I miss my babies like crazy. The only thing I can do is try to keep busy to pass the time. Of course, I keep torturing myself by watching the movie that I made to reflect on their first year. I'll try to get it posted later.

I have accepted a position teaching 5-6 Grade in a Christian School here in Wisconsin. I will also be the 9-10 Grade English Teacher. School starts Monday!

Who Moved My Cheese?

I got the title of this blog from a book that I read while working at an insurance company back while I was going to college. The book basically talked about being flexible and willing to change. In general, most people find it hard to accept change because we fear the unknown. It is hard to go into a situation blindly, without having an exact plan. I am certainly guilty of this. I typically have to plan most things out. On occasion, I can "wing it", but it isn't often that I feel okay doing that.

I truly believe that when one door closes, another opens. A lot around here has fallen apart lately, but many things have come together. To make a long story short, K1 was told at work last week that he is getting laid off. Doors opened up for us in Wisconsin, so we will be moving up there shortly. Actually, we will be going up there tomorrow and I will stay to get things ready for our final move. We are leaving my entire family to go where we don't know anyone. We are also leaving a place with 108 degree temperatures and going to a place that is covered in snow most of the time.

I can honestly say that this is the first time in my life that I have made a decision this big. On top of that, I am not bothered by the lack of definite plan because I know that God has a plan for us. Finally, I am learning to let go of the reigns and let Him guide me in the direction that I was intended to go.

Forgiveness

I have had a lot of time this summer to reflect on my life. I always thought that I would marry a fellow Christian, someone who believed in and loved God as much as I did. That didn't happen. Instead, I married a man who disagrees with everything written in the Bible and questions God's existence. It definitely makes our relationship more challenging. When I met him, he had been abandoned by every Christian that he met because he wasn't a believer. I said to myself that I would not do the same because I knew that he needed someone to guide him, not abandon him. When we met, I was working in a church and struggling with my own relationship with God. I felt like I had been betrayed by those who worked in a church and I felt it difficult to continue being a part of that church. So I quit going. Then, I had accepted the idea that it wasn't necessary to go to church to believe in God. True. It isn't. However, it does make it easier as long as you find the right church. Looking back on it, I have been betrayed by at least one person at every church I have gone to. Churches are made by people and people sin. We need to not let it interfere with our own growth and forgive them. This smacked me in the face last week when there was a discussion of baptism and homosexuality. I won't get into details, but it woke me up to forgiveness.

K and I moved in together about a year before we got married. I wasn't working at the time because I was going back to school. I kept turning towards teaching, so I went that direction. I quickly got a job as a Para at a middle school in 2006. We got married in Vegas just a few months later. Three months later, I wrote a letter to our local newspaper about the problems in our development, which led to us getting sued by the HOA and the builder of our house. We are still in the lawsuit with the builder but we won against the HOA. The next year, I stepped in as a science teacher and I've been there since. Teaching is not the direction I had intended to go. The Lord had his own plans.

Exactly three years after our wedding, we got pregnant. I always had the feeling that I would have twins, and one of each. That is exactly what we got. My plan lined up with His. Wow! Since their birth, K1 and I have been through some major ups and downs; many of them we thought would send us to the courthouse. Since B and K were born, I realized how important family was. I started praying and reading the Bible to the kids. I felt the need to get back into church and take the kids along with me. Although this has been the root of most of our arguments, he has still gone to church with me and the kids a few times (and then he comes home and watches his shows about aliens.)

I wasn't raised going to church. The times that I did go as a child were my choice. Occasionally, my parents went along. We did spend a little time going as a family, but it didn't last. My parents felt betrayed by the people in the church, as well, and stopped going. I want to do things differently for B and K. I want them to grow up knowing and loving Jesus. I want us all to have a church family to guide us along the way. I want my children to know how to forgive others, even when it is tough to forget the mean ways they have treated us. Sometimes, a church congregation can get so caught up with doing right that they start judging others. This is where the "holier-than-thou" attitude comes along. Sadly, they don't realize it until they have pushed good people away.

Despite having an alien-believer husband, I love him. He does whatever he can to make the kids and I happy and puts himself last in order to do so. This is what a Christian marriage should look like. You put your spouse first and both needs are met. He behaves like a Christian, but doesn't call himself so. I pray that one day he will.

Can We Slow Down Time Please?

I can't believe today is the last day that my babies will spend as 10 month olds. This time has gone by so fast. Sometimes, I wish that I could just slow down time.

B, aka little monkey, has figured out how to get on the fireplace by himself. He has also found out that he can get to the couch from there too. This is where I found him on Thursday morning while I was getting stuff taken out to the car.

K didn't like it when I was out of the room so I put her in the high chair so she could watch me in the kitchen. She was having a lot of fun playing with her Cheerios. She has been really clingy this week, so I took her into the doctor to rule out an ear infection (she had been pulling on her ears.) He said she was in perfect health and didn't find an infection. He did say that her gums were swollen around four teeth buds and it looks like she'll sprout four teeth here in the next couple of weeks. No wonder she's been fussy. Poor baby! Her weight at the doctor was 18 lbs., 8 oz. with diaper and clothes on. She's right on track.

We went to church today; baby Sabbath School first and then worship. I made the decision to transfer my membership over to this church from the one I was baptized in because this one is closer to home and I have friends here. We will probably do a baby dedication, too.

Online Shopping, Diapers, and Great Tortillas!

As we gear up for the kids' first birthday gathering, I've been searching for deals online and in the stores for party supplies and gifts for the kids. I found a really cool website: www. zulily.com. They have some really cute and inexpensive clothes. They send me emails with new daily deals. I got an email last week and it peaked my interest because some of the clothes were Mary Engelbreit baby clothes. I had remembered that my grandmother loves ME stuff so I called her and we both ordered some cute ladybug outfits for K2. B got some things as well. Today, I ssaw the most adorable outfit so I added it to my cart and continued shopping. When I clicked to check out, it said the item was "unavailable". How does that work? Not so happy with that right now. :(

This morning, I was on the phone with Grams when I looked down and saw B holding a diaper. I thought, "Where did he get that?" I realized that he was naked. The child took his own diaper off. Yesterday, he got a Cheerio stuck to his nose. *sigh* (I love my camera phone!)

On a different note, I've been craving Rosa's Cafe lately. Not sure why. Great tortillas, maybe? Although, I am afraid of going there with the kids now. The only three times we've been, I have left covered with some kind of food, drink, or baby fluids...usually because of K2. Maybe she doesn't like Rosa's or maybe I just need to take along a pancho.

Allergies

Since B has been through quite a few coughing spells and ear infections, I took him to the allergy doctor today. He recommended nasal spray once a day for a couple of weeks, then every other day, and then a maintenance dose every 3-4 days after that. Hopefully this helps with the drainage. If it doesn't work, we'll go from there.

He was about 27 inches long (I say about because the nurse didn't get an exact measurement because he wouldn't stand.) He was 18 pounds (their scale didn't do ounces.)

No Blender for B

Between here and facebook, I'm sure I have offended a few people, so let's change the subject and talk babies, shall we?
I thought, surely, that I would have to send B to college with a blender in hand...until today. His first tooth (#25) started coming in today. Hooray! He has been crankier and sleeping a lot more, so this explains why.

We had our first excursion at Benbrook Lake on July 4th. The kids liked it, but since taking Microbiology in college, I don't care much for lakes. It freaked me out, but I wanted to go swimming on July 4th. We left after about an hour...just long enough for the drunks to utterly get on my nerves.

Our first trip to Burgers Lake was on Friday, July 8th. The kids had a ton of fun. They played around in their floaties for a while. K2 liked being closer to the edge so that she could stand and splash around. K and my cousin, A watched them for a while so I could go down the slides and diving with KN. We brought a tent that we purchased at Ikea so they napped in there for a while. Eating solids was completely out of the question while we were out there. Neither of them were having it.

I got a picture of B and KN laying cheek to cheek.

K is watching on the sidelines.

B knows how to entertain aunt A.

So much swimming makes you tired!

Good night :)

Deep Thoughts: Careers, Family, Health, and Money

I've been thinking about this for a while and I needed to get it written down because it was driving me nuts.

Since I had kids, I've been drawn to family, career, and health stories here in the U.S. A lot of people here suffer from major health conditions: heart disease, cancer, obesity...and the list goes on. I find it no coincidence that the people in the Mediterranean and European cultures live longer and have less stress. If you take a look at their daily routine, they walk more, work less, take more naps throughout the day, and spend more time with family and friends. Many of us here in the States forego time with our families and taking care of ourselves because we spend more time working so that we can pay our bills. We're rushing to get to work on time so we stop off at the nearest fast food place to get something to eat. We work late to meet the needs of our job, which means less time with our spouses and kids.

I am on a quest to lead a more simplified life. The most important parts of my life are quality time with my family/friends and our health. Notice that money and things are not anywhere on that list. We have the tendency to get wrapped up in money and things. In the end, is working late to have extra things really worth it? I am the first to admit that I cannot decorate a home to save my life and I hate clutter. My new self-quiz when I am considering a purchase at the store is, "What is its purpose? Do I really need it?" If I answer no, then I don't buy it. I have finally realized that if it serves no purpose, then it goes back on the shelf. In general, decorations serve no purpose; we should be spending time with family and friends rather than looking at things on the wall or shelf.

I just read an article tonight that mentions that that the average work week for highly qualified professionals is 50-60 hours a week. The website here shows a drastic increase in work hours. Many companies are hiring more part-time employees instead of full-time because they think it will save them money. Sadly, this money-saving technique is at the expense of the employees, including the managers who have to pull extra shifts to pick up the slack. I am really saddened by this.

What is wrong with this picture? When did a father have to decide between working long hours in order to keep his job and spending time with his kids? When did a mother start having to debate whether to stay at home with her children after giving birth? In several European countries, new moms receive 6 months to a year or two full paid maternity leave. In the U.S., we receive 12 weeks, unpaid. Why is there such a difference? Are we that money-hungry that we care more about keeping money in our pockets than allowing a reasonable bonding period of a mother and child? 50 years ago, women did not have to work in order for the bills to get paid. Although, they could if they wanted to. All necessary bills could be paid off of one salary. When did it become the norm to need two salaries just to slide by?

Technology can be amazing, but it can also be detremental. I've seen some pretty explosive temper tantrums in public from children. Since I became a mother, I've started observing the reactions from the parents. What I've noticed is that the kids who had the biggest tantrums were the ones whose parents were basically ignoring them. One mother stood in the isle of a grocery store texting on her cell phone while asking her child if she was ready to go. She was not looking at her daughter, but her daughter was grabbing her mother's arm, trying to get her attention by screaming. I couldn't help but wonder if this could have been prevented by spending more quality time with and valuing what her daughter said.

We complain that we're obese and we complain that our cholesterol or blood pressure is high. Once again, the Mediterranean and several European countries walk...a lot! These countries also eat smaller portions and they have time to make their meals because they're not spending every waking hour stuck in a chair - either at home watching TV or at work. I'm sure the fact that some of these countries have afternoon naps helps too. My theory is: Based on research, working too much and meeting deadlines can cause sleep deprivation and stress. Both of these can lead to poor eating habits. When you're eating bad, not sleeping enough, and working too much, you probably don't have the energy or the time to work out. Thus, leading to obesity and health problems.

Our priorities have greatly shifted in this country, and sadly at the expense of many families' health and stability. Maybe these Mediterranean and European countries are on to something here. The U.S. companies could learn some things from them. More companies should allow more schedule flexibility so that people can spend more time with family and working on their own health. The happier and healthier a person is, the better their performance will be at work.

First Steps

B has stood a few times on his own over the past week. Tonight, as I took my hands from his, he held his own...and then took his first independent step towards me! Oh, how I cried. My baby is growing up way too fast!

Parents' Weekend

After having the kids 10 months ago, hubby and I decided to go to San Antonio for a weekend together sort of as a celebration for my birthday and for Father's Day. We got there around 8 p.m. on Friday and came back yesterday. We stayed in the Omni Hotel, which is supposed to be a 4 - star hotel. There wasn't anything spectacular about the place. In fact, I preferred the Holiday Inn Express, which is a 3 - star hotel. The Omni had "free" internet access, but it was only available in the lobby. That's not very convenient for people who are trying to get directions before they go somewhere. The internet connections in the rooms are $9.95 unless you are a part of their select guest program. They don't offer free breakfasts and the rooms are mediocre. We ended up with two double beds even thought I requested one king. Awesome.

Aside from the hotel, we made our way to the Alamo and the Riverwalk on Sabbath. We had lunch at Casa Rio, which was good. That night, we ate at Jacala's. A lot of people rave about their puffy tacos, which weren't too bad - on the greasy side, though. Their cheese enchiladas were terrible. The chicken enchiladas had no seasoning. We found Jim's Restaurants, which we really liked. On Sunday, we went to Sea World since I got a free pass for educators. Our first adventure was at the Shamu Stadium where we ended up in the front row or the "Soak Zone". That sign on the seat was no lie. We rode the boat ride that went into the water (I forgot its name), we watched the Azul show with the beluga whales and dolphins. Before we left, we fed the dolphins and I managed to touch under their mouth. Their skin has the texture of mushrooms...soft and velvety. I loved every minute of it!

The kids stayed with my parents for part of the time and then my cousin, A, (we call her aunt for the kids, though.) It was definitely nice to have some time to talk to each other and sleep, but we sure missed the kids while we were gone. Everytime I saw a baby about their age, I missed them even more.

10 Months!

B and K are 10 months old today.

B is wearing 6-9 month clothes and size 3 diapers. He is "walking" using the sides of tables and the walking toy we bought. He looks like he's been doing it forever. His favorite foods are sweet potatoes, squash, roasted turkey dinner out of the Plum packets, So Delicious Coconut Milk yogurt in vanilla, and apples. He prefers savory foods over sweet ones...like his Daddy. His favorite toys are the pots and pans that we got from Ikea, the toy table that my parents bought, and the little slide that the animals roll down. He can put the animals at the top and make them roll down on his own. He can undo his Daddy's watch and grab things from nearby tables or shelves. He lets me know when he wants to go to sleep because he'll go over to the swing and try to crawl in it.

K is wearing 6-9 month clothes and size 3 diapers. She is standing by holding onto whatever is near her. She tries to walk with the talking toy, but her stance is a little wide and her legs are shaky. Her favorite toys are the spatula from the Ikea dishes set, plastic rings, shapes and blocks, and the toy table that my parents bought Her favorite foods are banana, apple,  pear, sweet potato, roasted turkey dinner out of the Plum packets, and So Delicious Coconut Milk yogurt in vanilla. She will crawl over and climb up the chair to get us to hold her. We can tell when she's sleepy because she'll put her thumb in her mouth or her head on our shoulder.

They both play well together. They laugh at each other and crawl towards one another. Yesterday, B was pulling K's hair and of course, she was crying. I told him no and he let go. He did it again so I told him no. He didn't let go, so I had to undo his fingers from her hair. I said no again and he started crying. That was our first discipline encounter. I've noticed that B has temper tantrums. He arches his back and cries when we take a toy away from him or something that he's doing. K doesn't do that. She is much more laid back.

On another note, my aunt B passed away on Tuesday so we will be remembering her through a memorial on Tuesday, June 21st.

Medical Issues!

B has had some trouble sleeping the past couple of nights. He woke up coughing several times, so we did a few breathing treatments. I got my allergy shots today so I set up an appointment for him, too, since we're pretty sure his coughing is because of allergies. Yesterday, I noticed that he had some bumps on his toes. Originally, I thought he got bitten by ants or something because my parents sometimes take the kids outside. Today, I noticed bumps with blisters on the palm of both hands and more bumps with blisters on his feet. Again, I thought ant bites. I was scrolling through facebook and I saw that one of my friends' sons has hand, foot, and mouth disease that causes blisters on hands, feet, and mouth. I looked in B's mouth and sure enough...blisters and white patches. He's miserable, poor thing. I wish there was something that I could do for him, but unfortunately, it's caused by a virus and there isn't anything they can do other than to keep him comfortable. That is horrible to hear when you're the mother and your child is crying or screaming his head off. We're putting their toys in a vinegar bath tomorrow to clean them off and try to protect K.

I went to work on Monday to plan more for next year. Before I got there, I received news that my great aunt B was in the hospital. I chalked it up to being something minor until I got to my mom's house with the kids. My mom said that the night before, she passed out around midnight. My cousin C performed CPR on her for about 7 minutes until the ambulance got there and did it again for another 17 or so minutes. Her brain was deprived of oxygen for almost 30 minutes! She was sedated and intubated when she got to the hospital, and shortly after, they put her on a feeding tube. The brain scan showed that her frontal and temporal lobes were not functioning. This means that if she were to wake up, she wouldn't be able to talk again. Testing also revealed that she can only feel pain. The temporal lobe is linked mainly to memory and the frontal lobe is linked to speech, memory, problem-solving, language, judgement, and motor function, among others. My cousins and uncle are having to make a difficult decision this week so I pray that they be at peace with whatever decision they come to.

She's Catching Up

K2 stood up on Thursday with the help of her toy!

I have purchased a few things for their birthday party. Since we're going with a garden theme, I got some bamboo spoons and forks. We got some napkins, backpacks for them, toys, candy molds, a cake mold, and some butterflies for her hair. I'm so excited, but I can't believe they're growing up so fast!

She's Crawling

I saw K2 crawl on her knees today. She's moving pretty quick since she didn't start scooting until earlier this month. It took B several months to get the hang of crawling. He sure wanted to, though.

Exhausted!

It is official: K1 and I are  exhausted. My parents were letting the kids spend the night once a week while we got some sleep. With my Dad having a heart attack, we haven't had that luxury. It's been tough. They haven't been going to bed until about 10:30 or 11:00 at night. Sometimes, I feel like they stay awake because they've been away from us all day and they want to spend time with us.

I am worn out too. I take the kids to my parents' house in the mornings and then drive down the street to work. One or two days a week, I take them to the district daycare. I usually take my lunch bag, my bag with all of my work in it, my purse, their diaper bag, and their lunch bag with solid foods in it, in addition to them. That's a lot of stuff! I get off work, I pick them up and get home around 5:45 or later if I'm coming from daycare. I come in the door and sit them down (but of course, they cry). A lot of times, I have to take them in the bathroom with me so that I can change and they can see me. Then, I take them into the kitchen, strip them down to their diaper, put them in the highchair and feed them solid foods together (I alternate one spoon for one and another spoon for the other one. Lately, I've started giving them peas or Cheerios to munch on while they're waiting on me to feed the other one. It seems to work. It usually takes a half an hour to feed them. Then, K1 will get home, we'll change diapers and then by 7:00, we can start making dinner. We'll eat around 7:30 or 8:00 and then we play with the kids for a little while if we're lucky. We try to have them in bed at least around 9:00 but it doesn't always go as planned.

There are plenty of times that we don't get to bed until midnight because we're washing bottles, baby clothes, cleaning, or whatever else, and then we wake up around 4 or 5 a.m. because somebody is crying. The day starts all over again. These are the times that I wish I could stay at home with them because I don't think it's fair that they're doing without both parents during the day.

This week will be busy. Tomorrow, we have awards night for school and it starts at 7 and ends at 8 so I'll be home late. Wednesday, I have a late faculty meeting to make up for the bad weather we had earlier in the year. Thursday, I need to get my allergy shots. We do have a three day weekend, though, so that helps.

We have a new milestone for K2...she stood up today! Well, she pulled up to standing anyway. I didn't see it, but my mom told me that she did. If I can't stay at home with them and be there for all of their milestones, at least my mom can be there. At their 9 month check up, B weighed in at 16 lbs. 3 oz. and is 26.75 inches long. K2 weighed 16 lbs. 13 oz. and is 26.50 inches long. She's catching him on height!

Birthday Party Idea!

A friend of mine just had her daughter's first birthday party this weekend so I asked for her thoughts on a birthday party for the twins. I wanted something with butterflies for K2 but I wasn't sure how to do it for B. She suggested a garden party with decorations for butterflies and caterpillars. What a fantastic idea! K1 loves plants, gardening, and bugs, and his favorite desert is dirt (the edible kind, not the real stuff) so it seemed like it was meant to be. I'm starting my planning now, which will give me a few months to look for sales on decorations so that I'm not doing everything at the last second.

It's hard to believe that they're almost one! I am so excited.

9 Months!

Oh, how time has flown by. The kids will be 9 months old tomorrow!

B is standing up with the help of something sturdy. He'll even side-step to get from one place to another. I won't be surprised if he starts walking before he is a year old. I'll get in shape this summer, I'm sure. He's crawling on his knees now, too. He'll crawl over to K and I, and then hold out his arms or try to pull himself up onto our laps. He is a very determined little boy and he is quite the inquisitive one. He's funny, too. He'll grunt and wave his arms up and down in what seems to be a moment of frustration. He loves to get into anything he's not supposed to. He'll grab things from our side tables so I've had to clean those off to make sure nothing disappears or becomes soggy from slobber. He's in size 3 diapers (probably could still fit into size 2 though) and 6-9 month clothes with some 0-3 and 3-6 month stuff still fitting.  He loves to eat apples (especially with cinnamon, but he has had a rash on his face the last few tmes we gave him cinnamon), sweet potatoes, squash, blueberries, coconut milk yogurt (vanilla), pears, cantaloupe, and turkey apple cranberry mixture. He doesn't seem to like chicken, peas, or green beans that are homemade. He'll eat them from the jar, though.

K2 has reached her own milestones. She is scooting along the floor using the inside of her knees and feet. She loves to untie shoes. She has two teeth coming in on the bottom gums (#24 and 25 for my own records). She has gotten up on her knees a couple of times and she's tried to pull herself up to standing, but hasn't quite figured out how to do it yet. She is smiling a lot more, too. I've waited so long for that. She was very unhappy for a while, so it's a very nice change. She seems to need Mommy quite a bit more than B. She is very much a Momma's girl and occasionally needs to be in our bed in order to go back to sleep. K1 argued with me on this at first because he was worried about the safety hazards. We talked it over and now when he has trouble getting them to go back to sleep in their room, he'll put them in bed with us. My Grams kept them one Friday after not keeping them for a while and K2 cried and cried when I walked out the door. I felt awful. :( K2 is pulling herself up to the sitting position. Sometimes, she pulls her own hair...or her brother's hair...or anyone around her for that matter. She loves pulling on Daddy's leg hair. :) She is wearing size 3 diapers and 6-9 month clothes.

Mother's Day has come and gone. K1 let me sleep in. Although, I didn't know that was his plan until after I got up and dressed at 8:30. I fed the kids while he made breakfast. He couldn't find a good card, so he wrote me a note. Around 11:30, my Mom called to let me know that my Dad was in the hospital. Apparently, he had a heart attack the night before. We went up to the hospital; he was in ICU so he couldn't see the babies. He was in a good mood - still joking like normal. My stomach started hurting at the hospital so I went to bed early. A few days later, Dad got out of the hospital. He can't work for about two weeks, nor can he lift anything over 10 lbs. - including the kids. He is doing better, though. God is great!

This past week, I have been able to really reflect on life. K1 is a wonderful husband and a great dad. We usually think on the same wavelength. A lot of times, he has stuff done before I even mention it. We watch the same nerdy science educational shows and we usually have discussions about them. I love how he questions scientists' theories and doesn't just accept what they have to say. He seeks evidence or sensible explanations and then makes his own judgements. I knew that I loved him when we were sitting in my apartment and we were talking about snakes (yep...snakes). He knew something about them that I was sure that quite a few people didn't. At that moment, I knew that I would have someone who would challenge me intellectually and who would stand for what he believed in. I also knew that I found someone who had great deductive reasoning skills. I know, I know...I'm a nerd. :)

Since the kids were born, I admit that I've been a little (fine, a lot) uptight and controlling about how the kids are raised. It's hard not to be when you're an educator. I had this idea that I had to be the perfect mom, wife, and teacher. Well, guess what? They don't exist. It's easy for people to tell you that blah, blah, blah parenting style is best and why. That's great. I'm not getting caught up into what my pareting type is. Fine, my parenting type shall be called "We'll do whatever it takes to ensure that our children are loving, respectful, honest, sympathetic, hardworking, and responsible citizens." (It's a little long, but it gets my point across.) We will do whatever works for us. Parenting is a learning process. If there were a right parenting style, we would have had a manual that came along with the kids when they were born. Every family is different with different schedules, ideas, parent personalities, and so on. I expect to make plenty of mistakes and I also expect to learn from them. I do hear some good ideas from other moms and I try to incorporate those ideas into my parenting. If they don't work, I throw them out and try something else until we find something that works. I'm a borrower from different methods.

*Kayla, darling, you are in your swing and you are spitting. You have been doing it all night and it cracks me up. I wonder what you are thinking when you do this. Also, please tell those two teeth of yours to come on through! Oh, and it's 10:37 at night. You need to go to sleep! I love you little butterfly! :) Love, Mommy

*Bryce, little man, you fell asleep in my arms tonight after your bottle. Daddy put you in your crib and you did not wake up once on the way to your room. You are such a sound sleeper, just like Mommy. I love you snooger boogers. :) Love, Mommy

Reflections on Marriage and Relationships

Marriage - I find it funny when women are embarassed to admit that they have issues in their marriage because they don't want to be judged. In general, women are defined by their families, children, and marriages. Men are defined by their jobs, money, and success. If a woman has marital problems, it looks like she has failed. Most normal couples experience ups and downs. It's not about the number of arguments or what they're about; it's about how you recover from them. (In the book that I am currently reading, the author stated that children not only need to see their parents argue, but they need to see them reconcile so that they may learn how to do the same.) I will admit that my husband and I have had our own, especially since the kids were born. Since their birth, I have changed as a person and as a wife. Things that were once low on my list of priorities have become more important and vice versa. Church, family, relationships, and health have become increasingly important to me because I want them to be important to my children. My husband and I don't always agree on the level of importance among these issues and it's tough. Do these arguments mean that I failed? I don't think so. If anything, I think it makes us more successful as a couple because we realign ourselves to the same page.

Relationships - I knew that my husband wasn't a Christian when I married him. What was important to me at the time was how he treated me and others around him, not the label or whether he went to church every week. As I reflect back on my decision, I know that I made the right one. Not to say that it isn't still challenging for me, but it was the right decision for me. My husband treats me and our children better than any of the church-going Christian guys that I dated in college. Why is that? I still haven't been able to answer that question. I will admit that I don't go to church on a regular basis but that doesn't make me any less of a Christian than someone who attends regularly. On that note, I generally prefer the atmosphere of a church because of the networking and support that it provides. I love the activities for kids and I love having like-minded people around. It definitely makes the journey with God a lot easier.
Good night :)